So tonight I sat down to watch a little T.V. and found myself watching "Children of 9/11". Within minutes I was crying, as I listened to this sweet children share their story of how their lives were affected by 9/11. How they lost their daddy on that tragic day. The invites that took place in America on September 11, 2001 were absolutely horrific and I'm still saddened for those who are living life without their loved ones.
But for me, September 11, 2001 was one of the best days of my life! After 21 hours of labor, God blessed our family with our first born daughter. It was day to rejoice and celebrate. I remember calling a family member to share our exciting news, only to hear of the terror and sadness that had just occured in our country. We sat SHOCKED and SPEECHLESS! In that moment, I lay in bed holding my beautiful newborn child, in awe of God's blessing of life. While on the other side of the country, thousands of people were mourning the loss of their child, spouse, parent or friends.
Remember the song, "Blessed Be Your Name"? Well, it was a pretty popular song during that time and I fondly remember Ryan singing that song to/with our daughter in her first years of life. It was their special song. They would belt it out while driving in the car around town. :) The lyrics that always got me was the line that goes...
"You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be Your name"
For me that line broke my heart thinking how God blessed us with our daughter on a day in which so many others lost. Yet through it all, God is still good.
The irony came years later, when God took Ryan home. What would we do then?? Would we still bless His name? I have a new way to look at that song. Ans yes, God is still good, even when He takes away.
This week in the grocery stores we saw People magazine, my oldest "Lil Miss" asked me about why did they write a story on those kids? Is 9/11 there birthday too? And they lost their daddy's? It made me sad, thinking of how my daughter shares an understanding with these children in a unique way. She knows their pain and longing for her their dad, much like she longs for the day she will see her daddy in heaven.
Tears streamed down my face as I listened to the children of 9/11 share their story. I hurt for them and their loss. But then I remembered a verse God gave me recently (well actually one He gave me again, cuz I need reminders)
"But you, God, see the trouble of the afflicted; you consider their grief and take it in hand. The victims commit themselves to you; you are the helper of the fatherless."
It's nice to be have that peace and assurance that God will fill in the gaps. He will be the helper I need. Or He will provide that perfect someone to help and be there. I love knowing and trusting God's got my kids back and the backs of countless fatherless children.